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                  Goat-Song

Don't go into the wood at night
For there are foxes there.
Don't go into the wood by day
For there are adders there.
Don't go into the wood at dawn
For then the air is rare.

I did go into the wood at dusk
And saw the spirits there.

Between the path and the eldertrees
Between sun and the evening breeze
Between the darkness and the day
I sensed souls of goats who'd passed away.

Far from the house and the busy road
Where the eye of man cannot see
They laid the bones of dog and goat
And there was no-one to grieve but me.
The dogs had many fancy names
A life and a pedigree
But the goats just went to pasture new
Wherever that may be.

How long had they lain there in the wood
When their earthly life was gone
And the turf put back fresh again
To be baked by the summer sun.

Nobody knows that the goats are there
But grand-dad told me so
And it wasn't as if we humans care
Whether their spirits come and go.
These beasts were part of our household once -
Part of our family -
Now their skin and their bones are used
As food for the elder tree.

And the dogs and the hares and the rabbits piss *
On the grass that forms their bed:
Will creation be so insensitive
When the rest of us are dead?

I shall come out of the wood tonight
For we have food for tea.
I'll leave the goats to their evening-watch
For we have meat for tea.
I'll leave the goats to God's kind care
For we have lamb for tea.

When I return in a year or so
To walk through this wood and grass
Will I give a thought for the goats? Oh no,
I shall ignore them as I pass.

For the goats are dead
Dead, dead and dead
And we have lamb for tea.

Copyright Clayton Goodwin

 

 

                   Called to rest? 
 
Where will you lay me when I am dead?
Above my head what will be read?
"Departed Life" or "Fell Asleep"
"Gentle Christ thy soul shall keep"
Yet I shall refuse to go
If you do describe itso.
"Died" is theonly word I need.

Where will you lay my last remains?
Cremation's out -
I want no flames
No ashen
Urn -
Though it be a viking burn -
For that I have no passion.
Let my elements
My bones and flesh
Return to earth of their own volition
Not sudden, rash
In final, funeral conflagration.

Will you lastly lay me down
In the little Kentish town
Where for me it all began
And where Grandad, Dad and Gran
With Uncles
Billy, Bert and Fred
Have already gone ahead
And in the graveyard
Head to head
- For this is what their widows said -
Engage in daily mirth
Or talk of topics
They enjoyed on earth -
With mouthless skulls
And decayed brain
And skin that's tanned by wind
To withstand rain.

Will you finally bury me
In the local cemetery
Seen beyond the tall oak-tree
From my window now?
Among those long-abandoned graves
I have walked on summer days
And read the written words of praise.
Or in the winter long ago
Took our children through the snow
To evening-classes
Brownies, Cubs
And gym.
It's here that on your shopping-trips
You'll call by me
And offer tips
Of how to pass
The interlude
Of cold and chilling solitude.
But will you stay?
Or, like our children, go away
To Camden, Hampstead... further still ...
And then no longer have free-will
To spend eternity with me
If you should wed again.

Better it is to see me lie
In that place where I shall die
In bedroom, bath
Or on the kitchen's lino-floor
That's all I want.
And one thing more;
If I should go
While listening to a favourite show
Or watching cricket played abroad
(In which the batsmen hardly scored
And with boredom
Drove us all
To apathy).
Then you can say
That I have truly passed away
And I would let you keep
The sentence that I fell asleep.

There you would let me, resting, stay
And softly go upon your way.
c. Clayton Goodwin

 

 

                  Everything that lives ?

The great and good, the mean and lowly
"Everything that lives is holy";.
In essence we must all agree
But  - even though it is the bug, or flea
The earwig, pond-life, frog or toad
And in the earth the nemotode?
The wasp, the centipede, the worm?
Helpless newt stuck in mud that's firm?
There is, you may have heard,
A beetle that is born in turd.
"Everything that lives is holy"
A concept that is rather silly.

God made mankind in his own image
Two legs, two arms, a pleasant visage
A brain to think, a soul to feel
That's why He gave to us free will.
Therefore it is somewhat funny
To give these attributes to bunny
Pussy, house-hold dog that barks
The finches, sparrows and the larks
And don't you feel a stupid ass
To dole out brotherhood en masse
To everything which since our birth
Has crawled and crept upon this earth.

"Let everycreature rise and bring
Peculiar honours to our King"
Peculiar is in life and deed -
These are creatures who have no need
For conscience, morals, standards, brain
And do nothing much - except chew grain,
Or gnaw on wood, and drink the dew
Mixing it to some loathsome brew
With sewage, dirt, and for a topping
Guzzle down a bird's dried dropping.
Strange, then, it is to say
God, too, moves in a mysterious way.

"All creatures of our God and King
Lift up your voice and with us sing"
Do you feel a brotherly echo
In the company of a gecko?
All of you, I trust, agree
No wildebeest is quite like me.
The cayman's jaw, the hornet's sting -
That is certainly a thing
With which the world can do without -
Like wolf-hound's tooth and wild-boar's snout.
Is mankind, the weasel or the larva
Most close in spirit to Our Father?

When civilisation has passed away
And all the world is in decay
When everything has turned to dust
The ruin, debris and the rust
Who will have the wit to see
That this speck was you, or me
An antelope, a spider or a fly
For everything that lives must die.
Then where will art and culture thrive
When there is nothing left alive?
You may consider it more slowly
That "everything - ? - that lives is holy"

© Clayton Goodwin

 

                  Uncle Herbert

 

Uncle Herbert was a sober man

He dressed in black and wore a hat

Never joked and rarely smiled

He wasn't having anything of that.

 

Uncle Herbert was a worthy man

Owner of a foundry farm

Whom folk regarded with respect

Not a man to cause alarm.

 

Uncle Herbert married well

She was the landed gentry's niece

They laboured hard and saved their pounds

Lived a life of social ease.

 

My grand-dad was a poor man

He dressed in what he could

Never was in steady work

His home a bungalow of wood.

 

Uncle Herbert and Auntie Annie came to call on us in summer

And sat with Gran and Grand-dad on the lawn among the flowers.

Reliving deeds and thoughts of old

They talked for hours and hours.

 

"Do you recall that deal I made?

The money earned

The money spent.

Bought this suit

And Annie's hat

With some over we could save.

That's the time that you were drunk

Wasting father's legacy among the sots and knaves.

 

You went off to fight in France

At Mons and River Marne

Left the best years of your life

At Paschendaele and on the Somme.

I stayed here and built my wealth

Invested mostly in the farm.

 

All you had was given up

To raise five daughters and a son.

We didn't do that sort of thing -

Then in time we had just one

Our father would be proud to see

Of what I've made

From all he handed down to me.

I have the trappings of success

Have never spoiled myself

Done nothing to excess.

Hard but in all things fair

I do not cheat, or drink or swear.

 

And you, my brother Harry, what can I say of you?

About your language, about your style, and everything you do?

Mother would have forty shocks -

I'm sure she'd never dream

That you would drink, smoke, curse and

Even now blaspheme".

 

The sun began its slow descent behind the dark elm trees.

Gran pulled on her cardigan against the evening  breeze.

Uncle Herbert observed his watch, tut-tutted about the hour,

Put on his hat, took up his stick, and said they had to leave.

 

Then I was coming up to eight,

Walking to the garden-gate

Between these two old men

Their words impressed me even then

A piece of rural philosophy

That stays within my memory.

 

"Harry, brother Harry, how much I envy you".

My grand-dad stopped and looked askance

Herbert went on without a glance:

"How much I envy you".

 

"But Herbert you have everything

Wealth, health

And years ahead.

Respect and reputation.

Things I have never had".

 

"Years of anguish.

Years of sorrow.

Of loneliness as well.

We had no time for fun or friend

And now we face a lonesome end".

Grand-dad laughed:

"Herbert, you have the wherewithal -

Before you go to God -

To live in style and luxury.

You miserable old sod !

You envy me my poverty, my war-wound

And this humble house

This plot of garden-land".

 

Uncle Herbert twitched his whiskers

And said in a voice that was just a whisper.

"I do have money in the bank, position and social rank

And everything I sought to do -

But still I envy you.

I've been content but never happy

That's why I envy you, my brother Harry,

Your memories that they cannot take away.

I envy you your memories

On each and every day".

 

Uncle Herbert was a sober man

A sombre, sober man.
© Clayton Goodwin

 

 

                  Season's Greeting

 

"Good Christian men rejoice"

We sang with festive voice

And decked the halls with boughs of holly

It was the season to be jolly.

 

Grandad told his yuletide yarn

About his Christmas on the Marne.

For him it was but yesterday -

Soon his mind was far away

To the trenches, the mire, the mud

Where his comrades gave their blood

And offered up their life

To save the world from further strife.

 

But we had heard it year on year:

It was hardly, homely Christmas cheer.

So with only half a mind

We gave his memory-clock a wind

By asking of the gas and vermin -

For ourselves we were confirming

That the past's a long time dead

 - But left that sentiment unsaid.

 

Yet he still saw the poppies bloom

As if they were here in the room,

Not even family was as real

To sight, to sound, to touch, to feel

As the fallen in the field

Whose bones the Flanders foxholes yield. 

 

The children bickered - were sent to sleep

Dumped their toys down in a heap.

The Christmas spirit now was such

That everyone had drunk too much.

When we'd had an excess of booze

We settled back and tried to snooze.

 

But Grandad still sat bold up-right

And chuntered endless into night

Of bayonet-charge, and bloody slaughter,

Mixed, here and there, with laughter.

Compared with now it was an age

Made for heroes' self-less courage.

 

How did the old man judge our time

Of peace and mediocrity sublime?

 

"Although we've drunk, slept, over-ate

For me this is the perfect state:

The half-cooked chicken, lukewarm food,

The boredom, children's sulky mood,

Just normal life, a mundane sorrow -

That's the golden, new tomorrow

For which I fought, and by-and-by

Watched my comrades bleed and die".

 

 © Clayton Goodwin

 

 

                   Doreen Ellen Baker

 

Doreen Ellen Baker died

When she was just thirteen.

Her parents grieved - but they are gone

And all we know of Doreen's life

Is written down in stone.

Next year I shall be thirteen too

And what has life for me?

Will I be dead before I've grown

To full maturity?

 

Doreen Ellen Baker died

When she was still at school.

She studied hard and worked till late

In preparation for a life

Cut short by wilful fate.

If I should die and follow her

What use is it now to me

To study hard and do my work

For a life that will not be?

 

Doreen Ellen Baker lies

Dead for all the world to see.

Her family told her not to fear

That death would not come to her -

The law of average was quite clear.

For everyone's that called away

Some thousands more will live and grow

To adulthood and parentage -

Death's chance is really low.

 

Doreen Ellen Baker died

Unlucky little girl.

She knew about percentages

That she should have a life

To study hard and she would be

A mother and a wife.

And what, Doreen, if I should be

Another of those fated few

Who do die young

And are struck down like you? 

 

Doreen Ellen Baker -

You have shown me why

I need not worry for this world of woe.

I'll burn my books, enjoy myself

And taste of fun before I go.

Nothing I have learned in class

From lessons, life or book

Can help me in this fearful task

To give to death a second look.

 

Doreen Ellen Baker died:

Now nothing more remains

Of how she lived, of what she thought

Her interests, habits, mental strains

The treasures which she saved or bought.

Yes, I, like Doreen Ellen Baker, may

Take ill and pass away

And everything I've learned or seen

Will vanish in a day.

 

Doreen Ellen Baker died

Before she was fully grown.

And I may die -

Or I may live

Like all of those I see around.

What then will I have to give

To others I meet in the world

If I have thrown it all away

In sorrow for a little girl

Whom I've just met today?

 

copyright - Clayton Goodwin

 

 

                   Jamaica Farewell

 

Brown Girl

Let me sing

Tra-la-la-la-la

Of cricket

Of our life and thing

Tra-la-la-la-la

Show me a motion

Tra-la-la-la-la

Show me emotion

Tra-la-la-la-la.

 

Jamaica -

Land of water and of wood

Reggae raw and accent rude

No soothing Cozier's vocal charm.

Hostility, indiscipline

Bad boys who give alarm

Sent home in admonition -

From many people is one nation.

 

Memento

From a time of mento

Louise Bennett, Bim & Bam

Salt fish, ackee, mango, yam

Obeah, Pocomania

Norman Manley

Marcus Garvey

Sir Alexander Bustamante.

 

Brown girl, how you cried

And knew not why you cried

When you learned

Collie Smith had died.

 

Back then in your island home

Your life in exile yet to come

Took the funeral as a reference

Of your own lost innocence.

 

Jamaicans - then and now one people

One nation in your grief

When Kingston buried Collie Smith.

 

Always  heroes dying young

Their talent green

Life's-work hardly yet begun -

Donald Sangster and Bob Marley -

Promise passed

Before it had the time to grow.

Brown girl, do you know

The man for whom you mourn?

 

For - truth to tell

He was one of us as well:

Banners flew here at half-mast

On learning that his life was past.

We'd charmed to Alfred Valentine

With Ramadhin -

"Those two pals of mine", and

Headley hitting hundreds

At a pace.

Worrell's style and batting grace -

Adopted son

Of your island in the sun.

 

Brown girl, you are not

The child that you then were

When you were there at home.

 

"Whenever there's moonlight

You'll think of then

You'll remember

The first night

He held you tight

Remember the warm kiss

And his loving arms, dear

Whenever there's moonlight

You'll think of then".

 

Bananas green and avocado

Vere John on the radio

Bread-fruit and the doctor-birds

The tunes, the moon

The long unending afternoon

Hearing Arlott's golden words.

 

Runs and jubilation

Came your way at Edgbaston

Comfort in tribulation

Brought solace, too, at Nottingham.

 

"Your eyes are dreaming

They're always dreaming  of ....."

What could you do

At your school-girl crush's wedding

As you heard the choir singing:

"Too late he's gone

Too late he's gone".

 

It changed for all of you

At that milestone funeral

In your thousand

Sharing unrestrained emotion

Youth and childhood at an end

Before you came to 'Eng-l-and.

 

Sad to say, you  were on your way

Wouldn't be back home for many a day

 

May the words of my mouth

And meditation of our hearts

Be acceptable in Thy sight

Every night.

 

Brown girl

We shall sing

Of new-time heroes too

Walsh and Michael Holding

Adams, Lawrence Rowe

Hendriks and Dujon

 

With Lollipop, and Shantytown

In winter snow

And summer gloom

No job

  No Coloureds here

    No room.

One housing mass

From Lewisham

To Ladbroke Grove

Death by leaking Valor-stove

Violent scenes at Notting Hill

New Cross Fire

And Enoch Powell

A social hell -

Recent thoughts on which you dwell.

 

Go back into the other world

When you were still a brown-skin girl

Friendly days of festival

Before Collie Smith's own funeral.

 

"No woman, no cry"

("No woman, no cry")

I know why you, woman, cry

You weep for years which pass away

Leaving you no chance to say

That what it is

For which you pine

Is yourself in autumn-time  ....

September 1959

 

copyright - Clayton Goodwin

 

 

 

A touch of magic graced this earth

 

Bark on you hounds

The woodyard keeps you out of bounds

 

It is a wondrous thing I hear

The only thing to fear is fear.

 

Drab, dank and doubtful

The dark streets of Dartford

Bred no genius that I know

It is no place to muse or wonder

Of the world's delight and woe

 

Wordsworth had the lakes of England

Hopkins drew on his fires of faith

Blake saw heaven in a hovel

And fulfillment in his grief

 

Behind the doors and tight-pulled curtains

People keep themselves apart

And from the eyes of friends and neighbours

Hide the feelings of their heart

 

No impulse here to grip a Nelson

A Drake to cross the seas abroad

Naught to tax a Newton, Planck or Einstein

No immortality in one's word

 

Those daring deeds which won an Empire

Happened elsewhere, and never here

Where common-place, itself, is common

And novelty inspires only fear

 

Then a dog growled, snarling barked

Behind a gate in gardens dark

 

Yet suppose, just suppose a moment

A touch of magic graced this earth

So that instead of puppies

The bitch to unicorns gave birth.

 

Do I look or go away?

My beating heart took instant fright

"Keep out" the notice warned me

"This bad dog will surely bite"

 

Why risk my health, my body

The pain of everything I can be sure

The assurance of a life-time

To see something as quite ordinary

As a common household cur.

 

The only thing to fear I hear you tell me

Is that very fear itself.

 

In every chance of sixty million

Whatever odds you care to say

You will see nothing more exciting

Than you’d see on any day

 

Yet, yet, I never can be certain

This is not that chance in one zillion

In the history of our universe

When the impossible become what happened

And I had willingly passed up on

The one chance of my life-time

In all the days since I was born

To be there at the birth-time of

A perfect baby unicorn

 

Bark on your hounds

The wood-yard keeps you out of bounds

 

Copyright Clayton Goodwin

 

 

 

                Channel-Hopping

 

 

"We have no quarrel with this people".

It is with sorrow that we bring you

Each moment in the agony

Of their country's tragedy.

 

Rejoice !

The guns, the bombs, the killing

From our brave lads

To whom we gave the shilling

To blast to hell for our amusement

A tyrant who is not content

To leave world power

To those of good intention

With right to arms of our invention.

 

Bullets fly

Children die

Bombs fall

Old folk crawl

In death and mutilation

To meet the debit of their nation.

Broadcasters bluster

The generals fluster

To find the words to justify

Why these poor souls must die.

 

Their containment is our entertainment.

 

The news at noon

Is much too soon

To watch the aftermath of hell.

The news at eight

Has come too late

To listen to politicians tell

What they have done -

What they had to do -

In the name of us ...

That's me and you.

 

Why don't they say:

"We have had our way

And battered down

Some foreign clown".                                                                                                  

Do not wrap it in a moral

About folk with whom

We have no quarrel.

 

The tracers flash

And buildings crash.

Total up the score -

A hundred ?

More ?

Players of an unknown name

In this television game.

 

     *

 

Sick with everything we've seen

I press the switch -

Another screen.

Pope, archbishop, rabbi, statesmen speak of the need for harmony and peace:

That isn't the platitude which I seek until warfare and the terror cease".

 

     *

 

Crossing by the satellite

We drop in on a boxing fight

Where two strong men inflict much pain

With punches to the heart and brain.

 

     *

 

And yet at just a flick away

We find ourselves on the wedding-day

For a happy, smiling pair

Who do not seem to have a care

Except that it all stays fine,

And pledge their troth of Love Divine.

 

     *

 

Newsflash - newsflash

What is next ?

Newsflash on the teletext.

 

The water's risen

Floods abound

And have covered holy ground

Swamping churches

Shops and crannies

With inconvenience to kids and grannies.

Our kids

Our grannies ...

I must add ...

That is why it so truly sad.

 

But Spurs have scored !

And Arsenal too !!

The Queen has gone to Whipsnade Zoo

To view a species that was about to die.

It is enough to make you cry.

 

I am thus relieved to see

Symbols of real tragedy  ...

Our cricketers have failed to impress ...

 

     *

 

Here I must once more digress

And turn the knob

Back to the job

Performed in professional, expert fashion

To stir our hearts in patriotic passion.

Our airmen are all safely back:

Their spokesmen praise the Union Jack.

You would not believe our planes and tanks

Played second fiddle to the Yanks.

 

And in Europe - what are the views

As shown on television news ?

 

     *

 

In a room that's very grubby

A grunting trucker much too tubby -

As seen here on German cable -

Shags a Thai girl on the table.

 

     *

 

And in Rome

The civilised nations' home

Bored housewives strip

To make men come.

 

     *

                                                                                              

In Belgium, Paris

And in Spain

Our world, its joy and pain

Has become a parlour game.

 

     *

 

Let us now see

What is on the BBC.

A natural history programme shows

What each of us already knows

That for their life all creatures need

To fight, to fornicate and feed.

 

It's hard to watch the refugees

Come here upon their bended knees

To beg of us a charity.

Haven't they heard the homily

That charity

Begins at home ?

"Go back whence you have come".

"We are not blind to their harsh plight.

Yet arriving here gives them no right

To share in that they have not earned

While our own dispossessed are spurned".

 

     I have heard it said

     About the Aztec dead

     That those who died

     In righteous cause

     Went to the sky

     To travel in eternity

     With their chosen deity.

     For which in holy duty

     They gave the gods a booty

     Of human lives

     The beating hearts

     And cast aside the other parts.

     What is our Moloch

     Who requires

     Such a toll

     On our desires

     For so much slaying

     Of this sort

     To give the world

     A news report ?

                                                                                               

     *

 

At least on the commercial show

Advertisements may come and go

To break the monotony

Of this dull cacophony

In stiff-faced forbearing

Which for us is now too wearing.

 

"We have no quarrel with these folk" -

That has become a woeful joke.

Hitler, Robespierre, Attila the Hun

Didn't say they killed for fun.

They used the same reluctant words

Before unsheathing bloody swords

And later sought to justify

Why the innocent also had to die.

 

     So to bed:

     That's what the diarist Samuel said.

     And I would dare to guess as much

     He had no quarrel with the Dutch -

     Yet three times we were at war

     As he noted down each whore

     With whom he'd slept

     Or wished he had

     Which makes it all the more so sad

     That we do not seem to learn

     As we watch the sick-wards burn.

 

     Tomorrow is another day.

     What is there then for our further education.

     You do not have to stay

     With this jingoistic situation.

 

     There are films

     The ancient tales

     Of battles fought

     And victories won.

     The stuff to cheer red-blooded males

     With exploits that were really fun.

 

                                                                                               

     We stood alone

     We won the War.

     In childhood

     That is all we saw.

     Let other nations be ever thankful

     Humble

     Contrite and

     Grateful

     We saved the world

     For their enjoyment

     From a parlous

     Predicament.